The whole yesterday before I popped the question AND the day before, were almost nauseating. I mean... I wasn't exactly sick as to throw up, but it didn't feel very good either. And I'm usually not a pantsy ass, I don't know how to say this else and I don't know how common this is... But I was actually scared shitless of a refusal. Seriously, don't know how many men think of this prior to IT actually happening, but I sure as fuck did.
I'm one of those people which know they're perfectly flawed and was pretty much on the fence about it. On the other hand, all the slim courage I had in this regard was backed by the very strong feelings I know and FEEL she has for me for a very very long time (I think I've talked about this before - but she's had a crush on me and SEARCHED for me for 5 years straight; aside for the 1 year and 2 months we have together). We've also said it on quite a few occasions (to other people - very close friends) that we THINK we've found the one... But from statements to the real deal there can be quite a pitfall.
Nevertheless, after some thorough planning and after my ballsack grew inwards, I clenched my teeth, bought the ring, champagne, a delicious cheesecake had a gorgeous weekend in Brasov and popped the question at lunch with family

I stuttered, I mumbled, I was shivering at first I even put the ring on the wrong hand

)
But she started crying and said all kinds of YES, hen we both (and all the rest of the family) stood shocked and in awe and in a state of natural high ever since. From that point on it's just history
